If you contact me, I will say something that very few other lawyers will. “I’d like to suggest that you and your spouse come in together for an initial consultation.”
First, let’s understand why most lawyers do not do that. It is because if they are hired to go to court, to litigate, they are ONLY working for the advancement of that one spouse. And something that might be said while meeting with both of you, could compromise their ability to do their job. Maybe even to the extent that you have to hire a different attorney. It’s not that they don’t care about your spouse, it’s just that the rules of litigation require formal consistent separation of your interests from your spouse’s. And generally they are treated as if they are at odds; that you CAN NOT end up with what you need if your spouse gets what s/he needs.
I no longer do ANY litigation. What that means is that I will NOT represent either of you ‘against’ the other. I ONLY work with clients who are willing to work together to jointly reach the decisions that must be made in order for a court to agree to dissolve their marriage. And who understand that it is absolutely possible to reach decisions that address everyone’s needs.
This also means that in our consultation I will be focusing on the ways in which I WOULD be willing to work with you. They include:
- Collaborative Divorce [in which I work with 1 of you while the other has a separate attorney and we ALL work together]
- Mediation [in which I am neutral and merely I facilitate your dialogue]
- Legal Coach/Consultant [in which you merely ask me specific questions and I give you my best legal opinions]
When we meet I will be explaining each of these in more depth.
When I work with clients, the goal is to meet everyone’s needs going forward as best as possible with what you currently have. To begin your no-longer-married relationship on as solid and peaceful a footing as you can.
If what you must have is a ‘win’, I’m probably not the right person. If what you want is to move forward with respect and compassion, I’d be honored to help either or both of you.
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